To rest…& how?!

Rest. I’m not very good at it. My wife even says that when I stop working hard (which is far too infrequent), I tend to either quickly move towards playing hard or completely shut down to the point where my brain & body are overly committed to doing nothing. I need balance. As of today I’m not sure what that looks like.

Typically, problem solving with quick logical solutions is my forte. Not this time. I’m too close to the fire. I don’t sense a sin issue holding me back.I don’t see something on my calendar that needs to be cut out. My family feels loved by, led by, & connected to me.

Yet my lack of skillfully resting seems to handicap my ability to celebrate “wins” in life. When something goes great personally or with my work, I barely acknowledge it. Meanwhile, though my wife doesn’t seem to think so, I believe my un-rest can keep me fom truly being present with her and our wonderful kids. I alone know how distracted my ADHD-like brain can be, even if my body and mind seem to be “normal” and involved to everyone else.

I’m praying. I know that may sound like a cop-out, but not so fast. I’m praying with a listening ear about what God may have me do. It may just be something in my heart or in my head that needs to change. Perhaps there is a task I should stop doing. I don’t know, but I want to make a change or take some action ASAP. Yet I believe it’s better to seek & wait for His guidance. I’m praying and waiting and hoping with expectancy for an answer. I need to learn how to be better at rest.

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